Okay, I have decided to make a little confession here. I have a new obsession: watching camwhores. I know, I know, camwhoring is degrading and immoral, etc etc. But it also happens to be enormous fun.
The main problem I'm having is that it seems to be taking over all of my other obsessions. I barely have time to spy on my neighbors anymore to see if whether or not they are recycling. Sorry, Mother Earth, you are on your own.
Since I happen to be out of work, I have to find something to occupy my days, so I do a lot of internet surfing, reading of blogs, and playing with my Aneros anal toy. Anyway, I saw on one of the sites a comment about a gay video site called gayforit. I decided to check it out and see what there was to see.
Lo and behold, I found a section called camforit where guys with webcams can stream themselves for others to watch. Believe it or not, I've never talked to anyone on a webcam or watched anyone "perform" on a webcam in my entire life. Watching these guys, for me, was an experience. It's as if I was hypnotized and couldn't look away.
The first cammer (is that even the right word?) was an eighteen year old blond guy who looked about as lost as I was. He sat there fully clothed trying to generate a conversation while all the guests were typing things like, "Take your clothes off" and "Show us your (insert body part) now!" I felt sorry for the poor guy and so tried to hold a decent conversation with him, but I got very nervous with all the voyeurs, I mean guests, telling him to do things, so I left.
Since then I've gone back there several times and have seen guys do everything from playing with themselves to an explosive conclusion to watching guys just sit there and watch tv. It's all very strange and compelling at the same time, like The Truman Show without the creepy Cristof.
I do have a tendency to be a distraction, though. There was one show I was watching where the guy was "performing", shall we say, and after he finished, one of the guests typed, "that was great" to which I typed "It's Tony the Tiger!" In another show, one of the guests typed something funny and the cammer typed back "lol lol lol lol". One of the other guests typed "ho ho ho" to which I responded "So this is where Santa spends his off season!"
I don't think I am really fitting into the whole cammer/cam-watcher thing because I like to talk, and it seems like the other guys there, including the cammer, aren't interested so much in talking. Unless things like "You have a sweet ass, baby boy, now spread your cheeks for us," counts as conversation, of course. I tried to fit in and type stuff along the lines of the other perverts, I mean guests, but I just don't really get it. There was one fairly buff and attractive surfer looking guy who was "waxing his board", if you know what I mean, so I thought I'd chime in with everyone else and typed, "You have a very well-formed body." Not bad, I thought. Not nasty, but still a compliment about his physical attributes. But then I typed, "So I am assuming you go to the gym. Tell us about your workout routine." Well, he obviously couldn't tell us about his routine because both of his hands were otherwise occupied with his cammer responsibilities.
Well, I'll get it one of these days, unless something else comes along to capture my easily distracted attention. Until then, though, maybe I'll just mimic the others and type cliches. Perhaps I'll stick with the whole commercial theme.
How about, "You think that was so great? That was Nut and Honey!" Well, no, that makes it seem like I am dissing the poor guy's performance.
Maybe, "Takes a licking and keeps on ticking!" Ooh, but that just shows my obsession with all things oral. My therapist would have a field day with that one.
Perhaps, "Where's the beef?" Does that seem to say, "Your doodle's too small"? What do you think. Give me some feedback.
And in the meantime, I'll just keep working on it.
