I am a Dragon Slayer. Have I ever mention that?
Well, those of you who know a little about me are well aware that I am a very private and humble person. I don't like talking about my accomplishments and I refuse to name drop. Just like the time when I accepted an award from the High Chancellor's office in ancient Mesopotamia for taking care of that Giant problem they were having. The brutes were everywhere and I told Gilgamesh that I simply had to do something to help those poor people. You all know Gilgamesh, don't you? He was a ruler and a hero in his own right, not to mention a close and personal friend. But I hate to name drop.
Well, my experience with the dragon was somewhat similar in that I was at the right place at the right time.
I was visiting the isle of Avalon at the time and learning Shadow Magic. The followers of the deity known as Dagda were, and still are, considered to be the absolute masters of the Shadows, and their college on Avalon was the easiest to access for a being such as myself.
It was during one of our infrequent breaks that I found myself on a day trip along with a few other students to the furthest point on the island. I remember the day as being crisp and bright, a light breeze blowing in from the ocean water bringing cool air and a briny scent to where our party was camped. We had stopped because Master Brisinger, one of the college instructors, had grown tired and hungry and demanded a break. Though the rest of the group had wanted to press on, Master Brinsinger was adamant.
So, we had set up a temporary camp to heat water for tea while others who had brought instruments began to improvise songs. With the shade pavilions, tea, cookies, and fruit, the delay became a bit of a party rather than the inconvenience it had started as. With Master Brisinger eating and telling stories to an appreciative audience, I began to suspect the old man had something like this planned all along and had not really been fatigued as he had claimed. But still, everyone was having a lovely time, so what matter did it really make?
I, personally, was enjoying the company of one Lord Josiah Pendragon, cousin to the current king of the isle. Josiah was a lovely thing in his skin tight leather trousers, silk shirt open at the neck and his deep brown eyes. Ah, how I used to get so lost in those eyes. The beautiful Josiah had taken off his shirt owing to the heat of the day, or so he said, and had his head in my lap. We were discussing the trade routes from the Isle to the closest mainland town while consuming our afternoon repast. Josiah was so handsome and virile, I would have loved to have been eating something else at the moment, if you know what I mean, and I think the rascal knew it. He kept adjusting his head on my lap, oftentimes brushing against my most private of areas, causing a thrill of pleasure to shoot through me every few moments, and would then make a show of adjusting himself within those tight black leather pants. Before too long we were both showing ourselves in a way that would have left little doubt in the minds of the others just what Josiah and I had on our minds. Luckily, though, he and I were in a corner of one of the pavilions and were not easily seen.
Well, we were just finishing up a bit of rough and tumble adult play, if you know what I mean, when I heard a shrill scream cut through the air. Josiah and I stood up to scan the area hoping to see the source of the cry, and I saw my friends and colleagues do the same. Suddenly, appearing at the top of one of the surrounding hills was a figure running towards us and waving its arms. At the distance the figure was from us, I could not tell if it was a man or a woman, but the body language and speed at which the person was moving, it was clear that they were very afraid.
I grabbed my enchanted walking stick and began to head towards the person only to be brought up short. Coming up right behind the running figure was an enormous creature I recognized as Dragon, one of the ancient creatures of legend. I think the figure knew the Dragon had appeared because I could hear the screaming increase as they tried to run faster. Before I recovered enough to do anything, the Dragon opened its mouth, blue tinged flames erupting out of the wide maw to engulf the poor soul heading towards my group.
As the unknown person crumpled into ash, the party of students scrambled into action. Some of us grabbed swords or bows while others ran to hide under the wooden wagons. I, of course, merely stood my ground, watching the beast to see what it would do next. I am proud to say that Lord Josiah stood next to me, his sword in one hand, his other on my rear end, that feisty devil. I was surprised to see that Master Brisinger was one to run and hide. His command of Shadow Magic should have made him invulnerable to the Dragon, and yet he hid. It was quite curious.
Catching sight of our party of students, the Dragon rushed towards where we were camped, its mouth open wide and its eyes rolling in their sockets. Several of the sword wielding boys ran to intercept it, but I knew they stood no chance against the beast. Quickly gathering my thoughts, I pointed my stick at the ground and cast a quick spell, the grasses and vines reacting to my will. In a flash, the Dragon was tangled up in layers of grass and twisting ivy, giving us valuable seconds to plan a defense.
The swordsmen began to hack at the immobile creature as the archers fired arrows, but I knew we needed something more powerful than mortal weapons. I ran to where Master Brinsinger was hiding and dragged him out into the open. We needed Shadow Magic to confuse the creature and he was the only one amongst us able to wield it with any skill. Again, I was puzzled at his fear of the Dragon. Shadow Masters are known for their skill against magical beasts.
Dragging him behind me, we moved towards where the Dragon was still standing, though he was not as trapped as he was before. His tail and two front legs were already free and I saw three of the brave sword wielding students down on the ground. I shook the nervous Brisinger and demanded he do something to hold the Dragon. To my surprise, he raised his hands and spoke in the magical language of the Olympians, yards of grape vines spiraling around the Dragon's legs and body. The creature began to thrash around, ripping through the vines and growing more violent as he focused his eyes on the Shadow Master.
Or rather, the fake Shadow Master. At his words and spell, I knew this was no Avalonian Shadow Mage, but was someone else entirely. It was Dionysus, Olympic God of Wine, far from home. I knew that the Dragon kin had no love for the Olympians and would go out of their way to kill any Greek god, no matter how minor, they could find. I suspected this creature had been tracking Dionysus for some time already. Olympian magic was useless against the Dragons so Dionysus would be of no use whatsoever.
I went to Josiah and grabbed his sword. No, his metal sword, people, get your minds out of the gutter! I placed a quick enchantment upon it and gave it back to him. With a quick kiss, Josiah ran into battle, his weapon glowing with eldritch flame. Josiah hacked away at the Dragon's flesh, jumping around to dodge its tail and teeth. Meanwhile, I began to gather myself for a mighty spell.
I focused my strength and magic on the ground beneath the Dragon's feet. With a mighty burst of energy, the hill cracked open directly beneath the beast, sending it and a couple of the students toppling into a dark hole. With a final snap, the crack closed and the dragon was no more.
Needless to say, I was hailed as a hero by the surviving members of the party and each insisted on thanking me personally. Josiah's thanks was, of course, delivered that evening in my bedchamber and was wrapped in silk thong, if you know what I mean. Before we left, I looked for Dionysus, but the god was nowhere to be found. Everyone assumed that "Master Brisinger" had fallen to the Dragon, but I knew otherwise.
The god was obviously on the run from some sort of trouble and was hiding on Avalon. I resolved to look for him as soon as we returned to the city and before he could stir up any more trouble.
Little did I know just how much trouble that god could cause.
Excerpt from The Memoirs of Dr Mandragora: From the Maudlin to the Macabre
